These days the balance has tipped, and the odd kid in school is probably going to be the one whose parents haven't gone completely out of their way to come up with something 'original.' And so with a horrified fascination I present you with just some of the examples of today's children, whose proud parents have put them up for the South London Press Child of the Year Award.
(In no particular order, and surnames have only been included, in brackets, where they add something to the general sense of horror.)
Harmony (Rhooms) Massage parlour?
Paris (Smith) Yeah, we wanted something unusual with such an ordinary surname...
Kyllah Named after Ghostface?
Jake-Kaci Is that meant to be transgender?
Maksyhiliah Good luck to all your future teachers taking the register.
Aarian He's not.
Blake (Sexton) Are you SURE?
Uriah Not read any Dickens then?
Sahai-Joanne Some sort of compromise going on there?
Iyshitaa Oh, come on, what chance has she got with a name containing shit?
Issa (Virtue) What is?
Nasharn and Gyron [Twins]
Kearah and Kameira
Roman and Raine
Angel and Destiny
Also a vast assortment of Jayden/Jaydon/Jaidens, and a couple of Mahlias, presumably after the Obama one. Seriously, this is just a dip into this eight-page bonanza of wrong. These could be our doctors, lawyers and politicians of the future. How could any of them be taken seriously as a bereavement counsellor or something?